[9fans] Your Daily Joke From Jay's Jokes!

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Jay 's Jokes Daily Joke

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MILLENNIUM VOCABULARY

The latest terms to add to your vocabulary in the Y2K office environment:



* Seagull Manager - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps
over everything and then leaves.



* Salmon day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream
only to get screwed and die in the end.



* Chainsaw consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the
employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands.



* CLM - Career Limiting Move - Used among microserfs to describe
ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot
is a serious CLM.



* Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above
the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often
profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed
to solve.



* Dilberted - To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the
experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character. "I've been
dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this
week."



* Flight Risk - Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning
to leave the company or department soon.



* 404 - Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404
Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. Used
as in: "Don't bother asking him...he's 404, man."



* Generica - Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same
no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls,
subdivisions. Used as in: "We were so lost in generica that I forgot what
city we were in.



* Ohno-second - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that
you've just made a BIG mistake.



* Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an
electronic device to get it to work again.



* Umfriend - A sexual relation of dubious standing or a concealed intimate
relationship, as in "This is , my... um... friend."



* Cube Farm: An office filled with cubicles.



* Idea Hamsters: People who always seem to have their idea generators
running.



* Mouse Potato: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch
potato.

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